SPOOKY TIME!

Oh, it's been several years since I posted any good old fashioned HORROR & MAYHEM on my blog. It being Halloween, it's high time I caught the world up on weird goings on, and things that literally have gone *BUMP* in the night.

I shall begin with some of my personal stories of the sort no one with common sense is going to believe, but those with common experiences must.

It was two winters ago these incidents happened to me. Snug in my bed, I'd turn out the light, I would hear three loud raps by my bed. The knocks were startlingly loud, and it took a week or so before I realized the knocks were becoming startlingly regular as well.

KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!

Not one knock, not two knocks, not four. Three. Always three. As the winter progressed, I would turn out the light, snuggle under my bedding, head tucked on my pillow and the damned KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK would sound. I brooded over it, trying my  damnedest to push the reality of the knocks into the plausible range. Maybe I was hearing my house's timbers shrinking with the cold. Yeah, that must be it, it's nothing, it's just...

KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK!

Crap... the knocks were on my night table. It sounded like someone standing by the door to my room had rapped their knuckles on the night stand. It was not my imagination as I was as wide awake as a frightened woman can be. Maybe the knocks were... GAK! I dunknow. I mean, whattheeff? All winter long I would turn out the light and lie in wait of the knocking which either happened inside of five minutes or didn't happen at all. Either situation left me feeling annoyed. I knew if something wanted to harm me it would have done so already. Here I was - awake. Unharmed. Totally rattled.

The following winter was just as cold and I waited for the knocking to again commence. They did not. All winter long I puzzled how could the sound was gone. I mean, if the knocks were normal house rattlings, why didn't they start up again? I mean, WTF?  I surmised it wasn't my mother, as she had already visited and she had a calling card in the pleasant scent of a fresh cut flower. Was it my Father? My crazy Uncle Edgar (for some reason I thought of him a lot in connection with the knocks). Some other departed relative or friend?  I don't know. All I know is that freakn' knocking was as real as the hyper-beating of my heart every time I heard the sounds:

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

That's it for my own personal spooky bits. Over the past few years I've heard several spooky tales from others, and I no more doubt their tales than I am can doubt my own.

This past summer I was called upon to smudge the homes of acquaintances within my circle of friends. One was a new friend, who had recently bought the home of a deceased old lady. When I showed up at the new friend's home with my turkey feather, abalone shell and other accouterments, I asked her what made her ask for a smudging. She would only tell me that the old lady would not leave the house and that the old lady was driving her batty with unwanted... events. I could get no more out of her on the matter.

That same day I smudged a second home. It was the home of one of my extended family of friends. They lived in a house I have long known to harbor spooks of several sorts, two of which, sadly, were children, several of which were apparently just spirits that meandered in and seemed to be set on staying put.  Most horrifying I knew there of a 'shadow figure' that has been about for more than a decade, and which I had hoped to never hear about ever again.

After I'd smudged both homes, calling - respectfully - for all spirits and other beings to get the heck out of Dodge.  While smudging I called upon every ascended master and archangel I could think of to escort the beings that had yet to do so, to 'head into the light'. I mean, really, it was about time. I am happy to say - thus far anyway - post smudging, neither family were bothered again. Now, though I know I was of help, I know I wasn't necessarily the one that got the spirits out of the houses. I told both families everyone who lived in their houses had to ask the spirits to move along, and MEAN it. I told children in one home, that if they harbored feelings that the spirits were 'fun' and that the spirits were 'wanted' then the spirits weren't going anywhere and things might get, uh... disquieting. As far as I am aware, all took their situation seriously and were sure to vocally, with emphasis on politeness, ask their unwanted guests to leave. Their wishes along with the smudging seemed to do the trick. That is... as far as I know...

A Fairing I Did Go

A fortnight ago, I did realize I  do not take outings as often as in earlier times. Hence, I fester away at home: know we thus, all fuss and no play a dull lady maketh. So taking note recently that a younge friend of mine had recently gone a'fairing, I rallied meself for a like journey. With scant resource of tyme I did make a miracle, did scavenge up my olde bodice & lacing, skirts, brass pins, ribbans and other accouterments so as to scarper forth with style.

It was at least ten years hence last I frollicked at the Northern California Renaissance Faire. Sadly, the governors of the Faire, set the faire tyme from August through the day of Labor, all too hot for soul such as meself. In recent years the Faire folk did repair their error of days.  Now the Faire thrives from Mid-September to this late day of October- Huzzah! True,  t'is still on the warm side, but still, in these autumnal days oft blows a fair wind in corners of the shire of Willingtown.

Merry shire folk did greet Faire-goers at the entrance with a wink and a smile

I arrived at the shire early in the day, securing my entrance ticket. I soon noted two rascals who did ask a faire-goer to hold a keg - one large & of suspicion. Then, one schemers did apply steel and flint to striketh by the top o' the keg, in attempt to lyte a FUSE of rope! I laughed heartily at the poor faire-goer who did looke rather to prefer, all of his bits and bobs attached to his person, not scattered to the four winds.

A lively pair of Rascals with a keg most suspicious...

Oh such fun was at hand. I found a lady Austringer with her fine Hawk, a handsome fellow. I put to her many queries about her most beauteous fowle.














And too, I did met this young maid falconer with her adorable Kestrel, laiden with tiny jesses a setting upon her wee gloved fist.



















I was a-going t'wixt stage & theaters to view songsters and thespians alike. My first stop was to watch exotic dancers of the belly, at the Romany Centre Stage.

Belly Dancers! My favorites at the Faire

Whenever I sit at the faire, I keep my hands busy with my spindle, to maketh yarn, least winter find me with no yarn for proper socks. T'was difficult indeed to spin though when viewing Manly Men in Tights on the Royal Garden Stage. T'was easier there to stay in stitches than to produce such!

Men. In. TIGHTS!

A pleasing pastime at the faire be shopping of which I did much, eyeing cunning hats, fashionable jewelry and such, without once opening my purse - until it chanced my eyes did chance on a most pretty pair of slippers. They were much more in keeping with the spirit of the faire than what I wore - my dumpy olde 'sneakers'. The shoppe keeper did assist me in climbing onto a throne. Removed he my sneakers that I might try on the splendid black suede footwear. By the time he had laced them up, I did buy them on the spot, asking, ' I pray thee good Sire, would thee ship my old trainers to my hovel in Oaks Faire?'

'Good lady, I should with all haste,' he did reply, 'with a small fee for the shipping.'

The deal was struck. I sallied forth, my feet shod in prettiest slippers, so comfortable they felt custom made by fairies of the shire.

Are my new footwear not the daintiest size tens upon which you have ever laid your bonnie eyes?

Yeomen of Her Majesty's Guard

 I was lucky enough to catch a procession of her Majesty's royal court, but alas! I was too late to catch of glimpse of good Queen Bess. God's Teeth, can thou believe my most rotten luck?

Oh! Note the huge Cyclops in the background - hit a puck, ring the bell (his eye) for a prize

Following the parade I ventured forth to a place most wicked - the Salty Siren Stage were the devil's brews be served and no good folk beneath the age of twenty and one be permitted. The Sea Dogs, a most lusty lot were performing and again I laughed so heartily I could scarse tend my spinning. The main task set afore the Sea Dogs seemed to be teach their audience naughty words of Renaissance times. As they sang naughty dogerals, held they aloft signs so we of the audience could shout out key words and share a fecking good - Oh, pardon, I forget me manners - laugh. "Sing out LOUD for the dear children across this theater on the Merry go Round!" didst the wicked sailors & sea wenches shout. La, how shrieked us to a one, loud enough to knock bairnes onto their wee bums.

The dear lass on the right had a peg leg! No doubt from an encounter with a pirate.

How concerned they were to discipline their wee ape!

Cheeks red with the boisterous talk, I exited the ale halls and sallied forth again. Again I missed a prime event of the day - Her Majesty's Tournament of horses. Alas, I had to borrow this painting of the goodly knights at the joust on a previous Faire day.

I did visit with a lovely mare near the tournament area - she had the most friendly nicker and allowed me to stroke her silvery mane.  In the stall nearby stood a most fine black steed of Holland, with a young groom by his side.  How I love the scent of fine horse flesh on the autumn aire.

Industrious lord and lady of the court

I did sit upon a hay bale and spin in the company of my betters, the lord and lady of the court, who did practice their gentle arts of needlework and leather craft. 

A cloven-hooved faun talking unto a strange devyse

In the late morning I was a bit peaky so ate a gelato and a soft pretzel, so hot. T'was not victuals of the Renaissance, but it filled me belly none-the-less. And in late afternoon I ventured to the food vendor area there to enjoy an early dinner.

After my mini-feast, I espyed several lords and ladies, in the centre of the vast food court,  a'staring at the sod. What could be amiss? Venturing forth, what did I find, but this wee fellow, who seemed unperturbed by his betters. Now there was an industrious fellow indeed! Why-ever did it not occur to me to record a wide view of this wee & furry lorde with his surrounding court of admirers?

Then by our sides broke out there a mighty tug of war! Passersby leapt in to grasp the rope to advance their newly adopted side, east or west. It was a steadfast struggle which I joined not, but endeavored to cheer on those stalwart souls to the east.

At my bidding, the east side WON!

Soon the faire sun fell low in the sky, and I headed off to the sunset upon my trusty Honda steed. Here is a rare portrait of I, in my best Faire going clothyes, the sun a' dancin' on my nose and chin. What a lovely day t'was.

Me Faire togs

Teeth and TERROR!

Had a dentist appointment today, which is something I dread. I dread appointments not because I have any teeth to be yanked out, but as friendly and sweet as the dental staff are, the visits are bore me out of my skull. This particular visit however, happens to be in October, and that means HALLOWEEN! No dentist office on planet earth celebrates Halloween like my dentists!

                                 
I arrived at my appointment early and began to photograph the whole gruesome display with utter delight. YAY! It's like having two Halloweens this month.

Antiseptic hand gel anyone? BWAH HA HA!

A Rat and a Brat encaged

My Dentist

Finest dental products always for sale

Bats, Rats and somehow I ended up in a seer's ball with the freakn' seer!

The waiting room in which some of these souls wait for an eternity

 The entire suite is totally decked out, including the exam rooms and such. Not a counter untouched by spider webs. HAHAHAAA! Love how the staff take all the holidays DEAD serious.